


Motel Blues

by thegameisjawn



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Gen, Light Angst, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-02
Updated: 2014-03-02
Packaged: 2018-01-14 07:54:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1258726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegameisjawn/pseuds/thegameisjawn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>it staRTED OUT AS FLUFF BUT IT TOOK A TURN FOR THE WORSE I'M SO SORRY</p><p>On one particularly lonely stay in a motel, Castiel reflects on his mistake of trusting Metatron and his relationship with the Winchesters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Motel Blues

The world remained silent as Castiel contemplated.

 

He lay quietly in his stratchy motel bed, his side burning as his friends snored loudly, exhausted from a particularly difficult hunt.  _Friends.._   _When was the last time I referred to the Winchesters as my friends?_ He sighed louder than usual in response to this unwelcome thought, as if he could push out his guilty feelings with one heavy breath.

But sadly, Castiel was not that lucky.

He winced in pain as he sat up and swung his legs out of the stained bed. He sat in silence for a few moments, wondering why the Winchesters even bothered to let him sleep (or at least try too) on this bed. He was hopeless at almost every other human activity imagineable, so why let him attempt to rest? Even though Castiel was debatably one of the most intelligent beings in the universe, he struggled to find an answer in the eons of knowledge that were constantly flowing through his brain, a constant stream of angel information that was no longer of any use to him. He was new to this human life, and would have just preferred to watch the new installment of the babysitter and the pizza man's interesting adventure instead of going out on a hunt with Sam and Dean. He knew he'd just end up getting himself hurt. Without his angelic abilities, he was pretty much another problem for the Winchesters to deal with, and he desperately didn't want to add to the already crippling pile of issues and  liabilities that were steadily crushing the brothers. He had just wanted to help.

Dean grumbled and mumbled to himself, his body shifting uncomfortabley on the sickly orange sofa across from Cas's bed, the soft noise filling up the empty silence of the room and interrupting Castiel's line of thought.  _Dean gave up his bed to let me recover. Why?_ He pushed back his camel coloured trenchcoat sliently, and gently pulled up the right edge of his shirt, revealing an old looking bandage wrapped around his stomach, dried blood adding to the midnight darkness of the motel room.  _Always happy to bleed for the Winchesters._ He sighed heavily, while he tenderly re-covered his exposed skin, carefully not to restart any bleeding. _They knew the attack wasn't extreme. Knowing the Winchesters, they've probably seen much more serious injuries than mine. Yet they still spent the little energy that they had left tending to my wound? Why?  Why not just let me bleed? I'm only adding to the endless stream of problems that are plummeting towards the Winchesters. I'm part of the Fall, just another issue for them to risk their lives trying to resolve. Without my powers, I'm no help at all. I will stand silently as they die before me, trying to fix the mess that I made. My foolish decision that killed thousands will kill my only friends, the demon blood junkie and the high school dropout, the only people that ever truely cared-_

Cas stood up quickly. He breathed in and out furiously, in an desperate attempt to push out his guilty feelings with one heavy breath.

But sadly, Castiel was not that lucky.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry that it's so short, it just seemed right to end it like that idk


End file.
